McCains' Deep'n Delicious

Almost every who knows me, knows I have a weakness...it's one that leaves NOTHING to be desired. It's amazing all by itself, and heaven knows how many times, that has been my go to, my fall back on, my comfort.  MMMMMMM Just thinking about it ACTUALLY is making my mouth drool.It's this....You guess it! McCains' Deep'n Delicious Chocolate Cake!Let me tell you a short story about this beautiful piece of art. The perfectly pointed peaks, atop the lusciously moist cake, in the ever so vulnerable aluminum pan. They pointed out something to me, that I didn't realize I didn't know!Once upon a time, in a far away land (Slave Lake, Alberta) I ate healthy THM meals twice a day. Breakfast and Supper and whatever I made Mike for supper, I ate that. SO I lost some weight, and was very excited about that. I ended up at 187 lbs, and that's where I stayed. Which, at that point, I didn't mind if I could continue eating whatever I wanted for supper and NOT worrying about gaining :)
One cold, wintery day, I was feeling super lonely. No family to talk to, only on the phone, didn't care to go out of the house. Yes, I had a few friends, but I really didn't feel like talking to any of them. I was by myself, and sometimes loved it...others, not so much. Anyway, I went to the grocery store, to buy a few items I was running low on. I carelessly walked past the freezer with the McCains cakes in it. I had promised myself to not eat things like this. But, apparently, my promises did NOT make it to my brain. But ALAS, I walked PAST it! YAYI continued throughout the store, not remembering a SINGLE thing that I was there to buy!! The one and only thing that I could REMEMBER, was that darned cake!! No word of a lie!! In a super weird moment, I felt like I had an out of body experience, and I walked over to the freezer, grabbed a cake, walked to the checkout (all the while my mind was screaming at me YOU DON"T WANT THAT!!!!). I paid for the cake, and whatever else I already had in my cart, and went out to the car.  Then I drove home, and on the way, cried. I bawled my eyes out that I had YET dissapointed myself by buying the cake I didn't want to buy, and when I got home, I ate it. I ate almost the entire pan, and was wallowing in my pity party, but the cake did make me feel better :) In one way, and horrible in another. It was that day that I realized I couldn't even resist that cake. I knew, at that moment, I was addicted to it. Sugar, and carbs. I knew something had to change.I believe that is the first day in my life, where I realized that food consumed me, instead of the other way around.  I look back on that day, and compare it to yesterday. I allowed myself a cheat treat yesterday, by buying cheesecake, and I gave half of it AWAY!! That doesn't normally happen here!!  This week has been anything but "on plan" and I am feeling it!! It just shows me how wonderful I feel when I eat better, take care of myself, and put into my body the good foods that nourish me :)So, when I can consume food, and it doesn't consume me....I am thankful for God's grace. His grace to take me this far, and keep leading me on :)  
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