Joy In The Journey

Good evening from cloudy, cold La Crete Alberta!! 

I wrote this blog on our way here, and I hope you enjoy it! So pretend with me that it is Wednesday, and all will feel well <3 font="" nbsp="">

Maria

Joy in the Journey

how about that? The title of my blog, says it all. Finding JOY in the journey.  BOY THAT”S TOUGH!! Easy to say, hard to DO!!  When all the circumstances seem overwhelming, and you can’t “lose” it…but you are sure about to!! 

In all my journeys, I don’t think one has ever been as nerve-wracking as this one has been. For those of you who don’t know what we are doing, here it is ;)

We are going to northern Alberta for the winter (now until March/April)  for the logging season. Mike is going to be driving log truck. it is a fabulous opportunity for us. Not everyone has the opportunity to make a seasonal move to change the course of your future.  Homeschooling, and a laptop server for my “day” job, and the flexibility of my Scentsy business allows our entire family to just pack up and make a move! This will be a financially enabling job, for us to pursue our future dreams and business plans.  We don’t know where we will end up, as we can move around during the whole winter if needed to go where we are needed.  So right now we know where we are starting off, and that’s La Crete, Alberta for the next two weeks, and then we go from there :)  So as we go I am sure you will find out more!! 

We knew we were going to be going, sounded like to Slave Lake at first. We were to call and find out where and where we will be staying towards the last week of our stay in MB. So we gave our notice in our home and began the journey of putting things into storage, bringing it to the MCC and also to the landfill.  Over 5 years since we cleared out all our belongings, keeping the very basics for going to Honduras. Since then, we have collected things!!! YIKES!! It feels so amazingly good to clean out and CLEAN HOUSE!! Our storage locker (a 10x10) contains all the things that we will need to live when we come back in Spring, and I don’t think anything else!! LOL Not one extra thing! Our car is packed to the gills and there is all our “we need this to live for the next seven months” stuff. Such as the Keurig…caramel extract (you know you are a THM’r when that’s an ESSENTIAL) lol and clothing, blankets, some pots, no dishes (ill buy those at the dollarama when i get there) we are living SIMPLE!! Its really complicated to decide what you are taking with you, what you just want to keep and what needs to be going to bless someone else with.  

Anyway, we gave up our house, and were moved out, and could not get a hold of our boss, and so we had no idea where/when we were going!! Talk about STRESSFUL!! No home, Mike is NOT working, have NO CLUE where to go….I tried the whole “put on the happy face” thing, and it was about to crack wide open.  Not knowing is so hard….At one point, my prayers were so specific as to what I would love to have in the winter months, and by the last few days, they were “God, please, let me know where we are going. The end” This was accompanied with bawling my eyes out. Faith….just have faith… UGH….HOW?? That was my question…God I trust you….can I just KNOW PLEASE???

I stopped going on facebook for the fear of answering questions that I had NO answer to, and the awful feeling of being reminded. So sorry if I ignored you. It was unpurposefully on purpose.  Its not something that I normally do, but when the best things is to not say anything at all….

I am so thankful for John and Cheryl who allowed us to stay with them and we didn’t need to unpack the car to live, and who allowed me to be real. You are a safe place for my heart, and I love you more than you will ever know. Thank you for a place to call home <3 ...="" font="">put my key on your keychain she says” I bawl like a baby.  Your kindness will never be in vain. UGH…my tears are overflowing again, just thinking about it!

I am also very thankful for all the offers to stay at homes, of people that I would never expect. Thank you so much. I am thankful to know that I would have never been without a “home” :) God’s richest blessings on you all.  

Finally, and I say finally because at 11 pm on the Monday night, before the Tuesday morning we were going to leave, we got a phone call back. We could come out and work right away, but Mike would have to do different job that he didn’t want to do until the mill was open again, and that will be about two weeks, and we can stay on a trailer on the yard :)  Last minute, but still this works for us.  So off we go. We left Tuesday morning and had a great day driving. it is now Wednesday as I am writing this and I will try to update you as often as possible :)  No promises….

I know this is kinda a random, all over the place blog post, but it’s what I got! LOL 

PS I found joy in the journey….as difficult as it was

-Kindness from others

-caring family who understood when I couldn’t spend all my time with them

-gracious people making amazing meals for us (Dave and Tina; Sarah and Cam; John and Cheryl; Jenn and Shannon; Tony and Joanna) 
-God’s unending grace when I am frustrated, and not understanding and just walking

-my wonderful kiddo who under all this pressure which is harder on him than it is me….who hugs me

-my fabulous husband who has the insane courage to do something so drastic to change our entire future to follow our God given dreams!! 

Thank you for reading <3 comment-3--="" nbsp="">

Moving Forward

Morning y'all!

I felt it's time to share another AHA moment I have had here in High Level!

It seems to me that I know these things, but I don't really KNOW these things. I am loving the slow pace of life here, and when I come back people are going to be like, WHAT do you MEAN you don't wanna come out and play..... LOL  Im going to relish this time while I can :) I like busy, don't get me wrong, but once I am busy, I cannot slow down. God prompts me to do so, every so often, and it generally takes an illness, or a back put out, or something drastic to get my attention. So, moving up north for a few months, is exactly what it took, and I LOVE it! LOL

SECRET: Please don't mention this to anyone, it's our secret ok? I haven't even worn FLIP FLOPS since I got here. Seriously, the last time I did, was in Vegreville at the hotel, and they are safely tucked under the seat in the car. Then yesterday, I saw someone wearing them and I was all like "I LOVE YOU" :)  I have worn boots almost every day, and other days a pair of shoes I bought in the states when I was there with my SCENTSY GRILLS {Shout out to Spring Sprint team of Minneapolis}. So there, now you know my secret.

Anywho, I helped my friend Margie move yesterday. She was going to an hour away, and we really wanted to fit EVERYTHING IN and not have to make multiple loads. Then we cleaned, and ate lunch, and then we were on our way. It made sense to throw as many chillens into my car as we could, and pack the rest of the STUFF into her car {it has a bigger back end...totally jealous ;})  So we start off driving and the road is ice. Like ice. and I am swerving, going no faster than 50 KM, and start thinking about how LONG the drive is going to be. So we made it fun. Never going over 80 KM in the dry spots, and boy a drive SURE is different with FOUR kids, VS one.  We arrive, and her parents live in what used to be a church, so I ASSUME the entire parking lot, is drivable. Wrong. It's not. If you ever go there, its most DEF not. So, I got stuck in a drift, that didn't really LOOK like a drift! LOL SO we shoveled, Margie, Chance and I, and we rocked the car, and my tires are SO BALD that they don't get traction on the BEST of surfaces, so we keep trying. FINALLY, they pushed me out!! YAY MUSCLES!!! Or as Tina would call them, Kettlebells! LOL

We unloaded her stuff, and Chance and I head home. At 50 KM an hour. I drove a long way at 50, and realized that the side of the road I was on, was indeed NOT icy. The other side was, but for some reason, my side was not. Not a bit. So of course, I sped up. Then I started thinking. This is what I do in LIFE, BUSINESS, and SPIRITUALLY. I get swerving {something happens that wakes me up, takes me a-back, shocks me, hurts me, etc} and I slow down {Put up a wall, won't talk to that person again, don't want to take the time to help them out anymore, what do you mean what I have ALWAYS believed, is a lie?} and now, I refuse to go faster. What if I start swerving again? I'll just SLOW RIGHT DOWN, and most of the time I even STOP.  The road side turnout was at a very convenient spot and I thought about just stopping for a bit and resting my WHITE KNUCKLES.

I realize that I have done this all too often, and I need to keep moving forward, at 100 KM per hour. Yes, take it slow, test the road, but I went almost HALF WAY HOME, before I realized that yes indeed it is NOT icy here. Call my silly if you want, but I kinda wanted to make it home. That's all. I wanted to make it from the start to the finish. But can you IMAGINE what I felt like when I got to go speed limit??? Ecstatic. Although Chance was keeping me entertained in the car, by reading the owners manual outloud, and we were having a good time, I didn't want to spend the rest of my evening in the car!  {That kid I tell you...I am blessed}

So, you offer someone your business opportunity, your come to Jesus opportunity, or ladies coffee night for fellowship opportunity, and they say NO?  Keep moving forward. Do you BELIEVE in the opportunity? Then keep sharing it. This is why I shared my FLIP FLOP secret. I want OTHERS to joy in it with me lol. If I tell NO ONE, it will mean NOTHING to them <|:}) **Don't you love my little moustache man?**

So, let's keep moving forward. Be cautious, but be careful about how LONG you STAY CAUTIOUS!
Feel the wind in your hair!!! Let's go a HUNDRED! If' it gets icy, we will slow down to be cautious, but don't stay that way.

Don't let the thief steal, kill and destroy; Jesus came so that you can live an abundant life {adapted from John 10:10}

But, If thou fear....

I have always been in LOVE with the bible story of Joshua and Caleb.

Joshua, who had been sent out 11 other men {RULERS of the tribes of Israel; one of which was Caleb, another HERO}, to go spy out the promised land, came back and heard what the 10 men proceeded to say about the promised land.

"Oh, for sure, it is a land that flows with milk and honey!"
"Take a look at these grapes that we cut down there! They had to be carried back by TWO men! AMAZING"
"There IS a problem however....."
"The people there, Moses, are strong! They live in WALLED cities, and they are HUGE!"
"There are people ALL around that are our enemies."

Caleb shushed them. He says, let's go now and possess this land. We are WELL ABLE to overcome it!!!!
But the men that had gone with him, kept speaking about the evil they saw there.

"We even saw GIANTS!! GIANTS, Moses!  We were like grasshoppers in our own eyes, NEVERMIND their eyes."

The people who heard this, all those who had been PROMISED they would make it and take over this land, started bawling. They were ANGRY!  They cried, "Why did God even bring us here? If we were going to die, it may as well have been in Egypt. He took us out of there only to have us DIE here? WAAAAA" The "ARMY" had made its abode. Fear in the forefront, doubt right behind him, and pity, in the backstretch.

They listened to the voices of the 10 men {no doubt there were definitely MORE MEN that DISBELIEVED, than the TWO that BELIEVED} and even though God had PROMISED them they would enter the land, and overtake the people there, they failed to believe it.

Even when Joshua and Caleb took a stand;

" The land, which we passed through to search it, is EXCEEDING GOOD land! If the Lord delights in us, He will bring us into it, and give it to us, this land that flows with milk and honey!!! But STOP rebelling against the Lord, and don't fear the people, because their defense is taken from them, and the LORD is WITH US!  Don't fear them!!!!"

The people {Whom God had shown the 10 plagues of Egypt, delivered them from the hands of Pharaoh, parted the Red Sea for them to cross over, DROWNING their enemies who were in HOT pursuit of them in it, and that's just a FEW of the miracles that this amazing God had done for them} wanted to stone Caleb and Joshua. Really? They had SEEEEEENNNNN the miracles first hand, and every time when God promised them something, they got it, and now they want to STONE the ones that are trusting and taking a stand? OK.

God got really upset. He wants to kill ALL the people, and never let them get in the promised land, but Moses pleads with Him, to not.  Then, God strikes a deal...Noone will be entering the promised land over the age of 40, except Joshua and Caleb. All the young un's He would bring in, and because of the doubt that they people had in Him, lack of faith, He would not have them go out of the wilderness, into this land of milk and honey.
{You can read the account of the story, in the Book of Numbers, Chapters 13 & 14}

FAST FORWARD

Moses is dead. The Lord speaks to Joshua "Go and take over the land. Where you step, that place I have given to you. No man will be able to stand against you. Be strong, and courageous."

Think about how many YEARS he had to sit and wait for Moses to die, so that they could go into the promised land. He knew he was going, but boy, what a wait. And, because I am a human being, I know the LONGER I wait for something, the MORE fear creeps in. In the first chapter of Joshua, the Lord tells him THREE TIMES to be strong, and courageous. For what reason? Making SURE you get the message. I said I will give this to you, and I will, but you gotta go get it!!!!

Joshua prepares his people. He is leading them into the promised land, and he tells them, this is how it's going to go and if ANYONE rebels against your commandments, we won't be putting up with it. He felt so strongly with it, they were to be put to death. You wanna talk only of the giants, and not walk where we tell you to go? Death. The Lord WILL give us this, and there is no way we will let negative speaking take over this time. We are GOING into the promised land.

Do you think that maybe Joshua HEARD the 10 men that he originally went to the spy out the land, talking about the bad, scary things they saw there? Do you think maybe he just let it go, but then once they got back to tell Moses, Aron, and the people, he SAW what effects it had on them? I think so....we ALL know how this can go.
So, silencing the negative voices, they marched on. Conquered Jericho, fought in the battle of Gibeon, where the sun and moon stood still so they could finish the battle, and MORE!!!

Yes, FAST FORWARD AGAIN, lol(d)**for Dave**

Joshua is dying. In the last two chapters of Joshua, he reiterates all that he has stood for, tells the people what they need to continue to do, in order to survive. He was a strong leader, that filled the heads of the people with the GOODNESS of GOD. He told them, in that famous verse, Joshua 24:15"choose you this day, whom you will serve".

Then, enter Gideon. THIS is where my title came from. I had to give you some background, so you would KNOW where this foundation is laid. My lessons from Gideon are huge. Sometimes they are little, but that being said, the little things, can be such BIG things :)

Gideon, who came after Joshua, was stuck. Threshing wheat, in a wine press, which if you don't know the significance of that, which I didn't either till I did the study, is a hidden place, away from everyone else, because of fear. Stuck in a land of idols, scared of the people, and hiding in the wine press.

Then, the LORD met him there {Yes, in that place where he didn't feel like he was ANYTHING, or could ever be used of God, THERE is where God met him...just think on that for a bit}. Again, the Lord interjects these words "Fear not," into His talk with Gideon. Let's go take on the Midianites, God says. I will deliver them unto you. You won't die. FYI.
Gideon asks God to show him for SURE that God is with him, by putting out the fleece {Judges CH 6}, then gathers his army, and he has 32,000 men in it. Then God says there are too many men, Gideon. He reduces it down to 10,000. {Judges CH 7}, then down to 300. SAY WHAT???? God, I had an army that was big enough, I was still unsure about the victory, but you said that you would deliver them into our hands. THEN, you send some home? The fearful ones, OK I get that, but then the ones who didn't lap water out of their hands? *sigh* ok, I know you said you would deliver them into our hands, but....{enter the army of fear, doubt} Then the Lord confirms to him, that he is where the Lord has put him, and that he WILL succeed.

"Gideon, go down into the camp of the Midianites, for I have delivered them INTO your hands. But if thou fear....." 

You don't think God KNEW that he was afraid? Why would He say it? But if you are afraid, take your servant, Phurah, with you, AND you will HEAR what they say, and afterward your hands will be strengthened. And sure enough, Gideon took Phurah with him. He WAS afraid, but that did NOT stop him from doing what the Lord had asked. You can read the rest of the story in Judges CH 7, Verses 9-15.

The Lord knows that we fear. I am one that has dealt with fear for many, many years of my life. It has stopped me from enjoying simple things like camping, ministering to those who need it, living my life by being Spirit Led, because of fear.

"But, if thou fear..." has great meaning to me, and God used it to speak to my heart the other night. I came home from my friends house in High Level, and her home got broken into. She proceeded to tell me all the details, and the fear crept into my mind, then my throat, then the worst place, my heart. I came home to a BURNT out yardlight, pitch dark walk from the car to the house, thinking someone did this on purpose, cuz they don't want me to see them breaking into my house. What about all the wild animals...they are probably lurking somewhere right around here because now it's dark...DEAR JESUS....I don't know what to do...Mike isn't home till around 11:30 tonight, and I don't know what to do. Seriously, this is my thoughts. Turn around, run to the car, and go back to my friends house and wait for Mike. I can't express this to Chance, as he needs me to be strong, so I hunker down by myself, and pray for God's protection. That night, going to sleep, I hear noises, outside, and everything that is IN ME, cries out for protection, and I am so afraid. All I said to God before I fell asleep, which I did in about a minute, was "My weakness, your Strength". That night, I dreamed of a situation where I was weak with fear, but by praying and asking God's help, I overcame and IN THAT, I was able to help hurting souls. The dream is terrifying, but the STRENGTH in which I was able to do what I needed to, was INCREDIBLE. I realize, that I need to ask God to help, and He does. Every time.

The battle that Gideon fights, ends victoriously. God was his strength, and I enjoy this story so much. A man plagued by fear, that couldn't thresh wheat in the open air, hid in a wine press, and fought a battle against a troop of Midianites, whose CAMELS were without number, with a group of 300 men, and WON!  Now, who got the glory? GOD DID. Yes, Gideon was seen as a hero, but without GOD, they would have surely lost.

Yes, I am fearful sometimes, but then when I do things that are way out of MY comfort zone, GOD gets the glory, and we WIN!!!!

#lessonsfromGideon

Choose you this day who you will serve...as for me and my house? We will serve the Lord!  Joshua 24:15

{WORDS}

"Words can build you up,
Words can break you down

Start a fire in your heart or

Put it out"

- Hawk Nelson, "Words"

It never ceases to amaze me, the words that can come out of my mouth. I would say I have a fairly consistent personality, and I have learned early on, that I can't take anything back, that I have said. So even in my anger, I feel I can control myself. 

THEN, I catch the dog eating our supper on the counter and the "stupid dog, you are such an idiot! AHHHHHHH I don't even know why I have a dog in the first place.", rings out of my mouth. Then it slowly shifts to, "I am so stupid! I should NEVER have left that out on the counter, I should have put her in the kennel, I should be more careful. Sorry puppy momma yelled at you. AHHHHHHHH Maria, don't be such an idiot! The dog just eats food...it was right there".

If you have never done this, you are a better person that I am. I seem to be the hardest on myself. I am mean to me. That's not fair!  We know the words we say to ourselves every day. Ugh, I'm so fat; eat another Maria; just throw out all the clothes you are saving to wear, you are NEVER going to get there. 

 Or how about your parenting, being a wife, we all have days where we really speak negatively to ourselves.

This has to stop.

So, this year, when I hear the negative voices inside my head, I WILL stop. I will say nice things about myself. AND I will go a step further. When I hear the negative voices in my head about OTHERS, I will say nice things about them.

One small step for me....learning to be nice to myself, so that the light of Jesus can shine through my life, and hopefully shine in some of the dark places that others find themselves!

♪♫Let my words be LIFE, let my words be TRUTH, I don't wanna say a word, unless it points the world, back to you ♪♫

{Maria}